Hi friends! Thought I would do a video post today. If you have any questions for me, please post comments and I will reply to them.
Thanks for watching!
|Brian Stanton performs "BLANK"|
|The day I came home to my family (2-25-66)|
"Bathing in the reality of such an outpouring of love and welcome towards this infant, I have been struck that my arrival in the world, and that of my fellow adoptees, was almost without exception, very, very different. Our mothers (and fathers) were either planning on being separated from us, or were being forced or coerced to do so. Our grandparents were unaware of this impending separation, complicit in it, or were in fact responsible for orchestrating it." Good God. This is just the beginning of the story about the circumstances that lead so many adoptees to feeling rejected." (The Adoptee's Healing Journey From Rejected to Beloved, The Adoptee Survival Guide, pp.158-159.)
Wendy Barkett talks about her feelings and fantasies as a child and also as an adult surrounding her birthday:
"The wish was the same every year with a twist in the sequence of words....I made the same wish until my 32nd birthday: I wish to find my birth mother. Each year on my birthday morning, I woke with hope. There were years I would have never admitted to such dreamful hopes, but they were always there. As a young child, I would hope that my birth mother would show up at our front door with a huge bundle of balloons. I could never see her face in these daydreams, as the balloons were in the way. However, I would know it was her the instant I opened the door and she always got to stay for my party. As I became a teen, the hope turned to a phone call or letter from her. Each time the phone rang, my body tensed with hope and then disappointment. The balloons, the letter and the phone call never came. I stayed silent about my wish because I knew the golden rule: Don't tell anyone your birthday wish or it won't come true. (Birth Day, The Adoptee Survival Guide, pp. 6-7).
Fast forward 40 years. The social worker at the agency of my adoption found my mother late summer of 2016. Shortly thereafter, I recall sitting in the basement on the couch listening to my mother's voice for the first time. Her voice and the conversation was not what I expected. I felt like I was living in slow motion, in some kind of pretend world. She talked alot. I listened.
First meeting at The Cradle with Mrs. Magee, the social worker
|Photo credit: Adoptionlearningpartners.org|
|The yellow is my 11% Irish :)|
|NCSL-Minneapolis, MN - 2014|